


Letters From the End of the World

by CourtneyFG



Series: The lies we tell ourselves to survive [2]
Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-09
Updated: 2017-06-04
Packaged: 2018-08-07 14:05:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7717648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CourtneyFG/pseuds/CourtneyFG
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Part 2 of The Lies We Tell Ourselves to Survive (must read part 1 or this will make no sense)</p><p>Korra and Asami have gone their seperate ways and are both haunted by their pasts, while discovering more about who they are as people. </p><p>Will they find their way back to each other?<br/>Will Asami forgive Hiroshi?<br/>Will Korra finally give up on twitter and migrate to instagram?<br/>and<br/>Will Bolin ever learn how to act like a normal person?</p><p>Find out now.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Three Months Later

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for the long delay due to life and stuff, also I met Amy Acker back in March and I still get a dorky grin on my face when I think about it, so I felt like sharing.  
> This part of the story will be largely told through letters and little snippets of that’s been happening to our heroines. We’ll see some familiar faces as I pull people out of their timelines and shove them into this fic.  
> Unlike Part 1 there will be some major time jumps in this part and the rating might change but do note that at the moment there isn’t any planned smut so the rating is for other things (like language and violence)  
> I hope you enjoy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been three months and Asami's made a few big decisions in her life.

Asami chanced a look in the mirror that was on the handlebars of her bike. Her pursuer was gaining on her and she couldn’t let happen. The road ahead took a tight bend; on the outside of the bend was steep drop down into the water, on the inside, a cliff face looking above her. She knew she should be slowing down to take the turn but she couldn’t risk it, on the other hand the high speed could cause her to loose the bike from under her and they’d both end up in the drink. The bend was drawing closer and she needed to make a choice. Asami eased the break on, angled into the turn, a few loose rocks on the road made her lose traction and as the wheels began to spin out from under her, she felt a cold hollowness inside and she accepted her fate, she was going to die. One, life consuming, half second later the tyres caught purchase on the bitumen. She quickly righted herself before opening the throttle and speeding off down the narrow road.

The road ahead stretched forwards and upwards towards the large land mass but either side were steep drops down to water, behind, just one man on a bike, whom she would not let catch her. Asami kept her eyes ahead and tried to ignore the plummeting feeling in her stomach as she soared rapidly up the steep incline. She knew what she was doing was risky and she had no one else to blame for the position that she was in but herself but she needed to do this.

The final few metres of road levelled out ahead of her and she quietly thanked Raava that she made it across in one piece. Over the next few hundred metres Asami pulled to a stop and looked across to see her opponent do the same. She dropped the kickstand and dismounted her ride and removed her helmet before walking over to her defeated opponent and offering him her hand.

“Good race” She offered as they shook hands, “thanks for suggesting Serpent’s Pass, I just assumed that this place had eroded years ago.”

The man removed his helmet and Asami did her best not to wince at the sight of his unfortunate burn scar that covered the skin around his left eye. He gave her a look that said that he’d seen her slight shudder but forgave her. “Yeah, that’s why this place has restricted access, lucky thing my husband’s a diplomat or we would never have been allowed access.’’

Asami chuckled at that, she was aware of her companion’s connections and was glad that she was able to gain benefit from them. “So, since it’s your day off, you got anything else planed for today?” She was hoping the answer was _no_ , she was enjoying Zuko’s company and wasn’t ready to be left alone with her thoughts. Her own mind hated her ad she needed a distraction from mall that was swirling around in there.

“Yeah, actually.” Zuko replied, “I’ve got to get back to Be Sing Se, it’s date night and Aang doesn’t like it when I’m late.”

“Oh.” Asami couldn’t deny that she was a little disappointed but she understood. She’d monopolised enough of Zuko’s time as it was. It had been at Iroh’s insistence that she meet up with his nephew should her travels take her to Ba Sing Se. She was glad that she had caved to the old man’s insistence because her and Zuko had hit it off right away. They had a lot in common, disapproving fathers whom had high expectations, being disowned. Zuko had proved himself to be a good listener and friend, as well as a good Pi Sho opponent. “That’s cool I’ll just head back to my hotel room. Look I’m probably going to be moving along soon, but I’ll be sure to stop by the tea house before I leave to say good bye.”

He raised an eyebrow at her in curiosity. “You’re not following me back into town?”

Asami felt conflicted and guilty inside, she’d grown fond of Zuko’s companionship and she wasn’t looking forward to saying _goodbye_ because she’d probably grown a little _too_ fond. Also she missed Korra, _No, I’m not thinking about her now. She hasn’t even called or texted or even emailed in the past two months, why hasn’t she… No. Definitely not thinking about Korra._ She shook her head to clear her thoughts and returned her attention back to Zuko. “No, the day’s still young. I think I’ll take the scenic route back then catch the barge across Full Moon Bay.”

“Have it your way. Just don’t leave town without dropping in to the Jasmine Dragon one last time.”

“I won’t or I’ll have the wrath of Iroh to deal with.”

“And by _wrath_ you mean mind boggling metaphors that make absolutely no sense.”

“Exactly.” They both chuckled at that.

\---

The warm bubbles threatened to inundate her as she slipped into the large spa bath in her hotel suit. For most of her journey over the past two months she’d travelled incognito, no make up, no Future Industries riding leathers, no expensive hotels, just her on her bike and whatever dodgy motels she came across on the way, Ba Sing Se had been her exception. So far she’d explored most of the Fire Nation, after spending a week with Mai and had just started her trek across the Earth Kingdom. The days were long and her body wasn’t used to the level of near constant riding she was doing, so she’d splurged and booked herself a suit in the Upper Ring of Ba Sing Se. The warm water soothed her aching muscles and she reached a hand over the edge of the bath to retrieve the glass of chilled white wine and took a sip. The stark contrast in temperature between that of the bath water and the wine, made each feel that much or extreme and pleasurable at the same time. She hummed in contentment and wished life could always be this tranquil.

 _It can be,_ She thought to herself. _I did quit my job after all and yes, I did sign a contract to be an independent consultant, but that doesn’t mean I can’t live a life of comfort and luxury. I wouldn’t even have to work another day in my whole life; I could just live here, living off the income from my shares in F.I._

Future Industries was and always had been privately owned family company. Her great-great-grandfather had started it and it had been passed down the Sato line. Her own father had inherited the controlling share of the company as a wedding present from his father, who also made the unprecedented decision to gift the remaining 40-precent to her mother, in hopes that they would work together to carve out an innovative future for the company, between his engineering prowess and her eye for design he didn’t think the duo could fail. Then Asami had inherited her mother’s shares, instantaneously making her the richest woman in the world at the age of six.

Asami knew that she couldn’t do _nothing_ , she’d go insane with boredom, but she didn’t have to think about that now. Right now all she had to worry about was exploring the world and making sure there was enough fuel in the tank to get to the next town. She had very few needs in life, food and shelter were at the top of the list of things that humans needed to survive, maybe there was something on that list starting with L but she wasn’t thinking about that now. Logically she knew that she was the one to break up with Korra and so couldn’t be mad about her lack of communication but she felt like being irrational and it felt better to be mad at Korra then to be mad at herself.

Time past by and soon the water in the bath could only barely be called warm, her glass of wine was empty and her fingers and toes were shrivelled. She exited the spa, quickly dried herself off, then wrapped herself in one of the hotels plush bathrobes before making her way to the bedroom. Once there she fished a clean pair of panties out of her luggage, slipped them on, then wriggled her way between the sheets. She didn’t bother with nightclothes, there was no one around to be modest for and the high quality bedding meant that she wasn’t going to freeze. Once settled in and warm, Asami leaned over and switched on the bedside lamp, then switched off the ceiling light, before retrieving the box of letters from the draw in the bedside table.

This had become Asami’s new nightly ritual, reading her mother’s letters to Kiyomi. Every night she would read a letter or two before bed and it almost felt like her mother was there reading a bedtime story to her and it made her feel warm and sad inside. She hadn’t read all the letters yet but she already had favourites that she’d read multiple times.

* * *

 

> _March 20 th 1986_
> 
> _My Dearest Kiyomi,_
> 
> _It feels so strange writing you a letter and not talking to you in person. I’ve started this letter a dozen times but what comes out just sounds trite and unnatural. Here’s hoping I finish this one._
> 
> _The month on Kiyoshi was a great honeymoon. The local history and legends of the Avatar are fascinating. They have this one story about how an Avatar, who lived to be over 200 years old, separated a peninsula from the mainland and that’s how the island was formed. But I digress._
> 
> _Hiro and I are now safely in Republic city. He’s in at the office at the moment negotiating the terms of the ownership handover. His father wants to go into early retirement but Hiro wants him to stay on as CEO for a little while longer. I guess I’ll found out how it goes when he gets back later._
> 
> _We’re currently living in the penthouse suit of the Four Elements Hotel (although you probably guessed from the return address). Mr Sato plans to move out of the Sato Estate upon retirement. He says that it’s too big for just him and that a family should live there. I know he’s not pressuring us to have children just yet but the thought make me giddy. You know I’ve slways wanted a large family, I’m just not sure if I’m ready for the responsibility. I still feel like a child myself._
> 
> _That’s enough about me though. What about you? How have you been? Don’t think I didn’t notice you hitting it off with the florist at the wedding. She was cute. Please tell me it went past idle flirting, you have been single for far too long._
> 
> _Also you’re going to have to fill me in on all the gossip I’m missing. I haven’t made any new friends in the city and I need some form of entertainment. I don’t want to make a mess in the suit by going all out on my art so I’m going slightly mad with boredom._
> 
> _I miss you._
> 
> _Love,_
> 
> Yasi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always,  
> Comments?  
> Thoughts?  
> Typos?  
> Let me know below


	2. Winds from the South

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We discover what Korra's been up to for the past three months and learn how she plans to step forward into her future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After writing Asami's chapter this one became a lot easier to finish, having started it first. Don't expect the next chapter to go up this quick, I just needed to get Korra's journey started.

A light breeze ticked the hair around Korra’s ear. Her cute pixie cut had grown out into a choppy bob and as much as she hated how un-kept it looked, she didn’t have anyone to look good for anymore, so it didn’t matter. Her gaze absently fell on the bustle of students outside the window. She could just tell that they were young and idealistic unmarred by the brutality of the world.

‘Korra?’

She didn’t know if it was sad or reassuring that these people lived in a bubble where they were able to live with such naivety.

‘Korra? Are you even listening to me?’

A soft cushion hit her in the face and Korra snapped her attention back to the man in front of her. He wore simple orange robes and an easy smile and his eyes held a knowingness that set her at ease.

‘Sorry Monk Gyatso, I drifted off there for a moment.’ She rubbed the back of her neck and offered him an apologetic smile.

‘It’s quite alright Korra, I’ve known you for long enough to not get offended when you space out. I was just going over the terms of your scholarship. Which to be honest, are non-existent on your end, just keep yourself out of trouble and you’ll always have a place at this university regardless of grades. I’ve also arranged for you to stay in the temple with the monks and not in the student dormitories. This arrangement also means that they monks will be able to look after Naga while your attending classes.’

‘Thank you so much Gyatso, you didn’t have to go to all this trouble but I’m grateful that did.’

‘Korra, the Air Nation Peacekeepers are indebted to you. This is the least we can do to show our gratitude.’ He bowed deeply to her to which she returned the gesture. ‘Now there is just one lest thing we need to sort out before we get you settled in. As you are no longer in Republic City it makes it difficult to continue your sessions with Dr Tenzin, however I was able to pull some strings and while it is unorthodox considering our working relationship, I’ve had your case transferred to me for the duration of your stay here with us.’

That did put some of Korra’s misgivings about this whole endeavour at ease. She had told her parents that is was a spur of the moment decision but the idea had niggled at her since her trip with Asami to the Fire Nation and their walk around the campus there, but she knew how fragile she’d been recently with her PTSD she hadn’t wanted to disrupt her recovery too much. Knowing that Monk Gyatso was going to help her was reassuring. Not only was he the world’s best clinical psychologist, he was also the founder of the Air Nation Peacekeeper and Dean of Students at Sothern Air Temple University.

This time it was Korra’s time to bow, to which he through another cushion at her while his face was plastered with a huge grin.

* * *

 

Her quarters were spacious compared to her expectations but they were based on boarding school and camp housing. The room came equipped with a double bed, built in wardrobe, chest of draws, book shelf, desk (complete with TV and PS3) and a footlocker. The room also had a sizable ensuite, as well as a window that overlooked the courtyard and meditation pavilion in the temple. Her luggage was already waiting for her resting against the footlocker, so with nothing else to do before classes started next week, Korra decided to unpack.

Her parents had sent her off to uni with more possessions that she ever remembered having. Upon arriving home her parents had showered her with presents and shopping trips and she wasn’t sure if it was to try and cheer her up or to make up for being so absent in her life. The first things she pulled out were the pelts that her mother had insisted that she take. Her mother stated that living in Republic City had turned her soft, based solely on the observation that she wore a jacket over her singlet top while they were in the south. Korra scattered the pelts over the bed and returned to her unpacking.

Korra put her clothes away next and took extra special care with the new dresses that her mother insisted that she needed as well. Next was the new laptop, that her dad had bought for her, she placed it on the desk along with the letter containing the university’s WiFi login details that Gyatso had given her. The rest of her possessions were fairly mundane, just a few toiletries, a family photo, a few books and finally, her stationary supplies along with the empty, leather bound journal that had been haunting her for weeks.

Tenzin’s advice was always in the back of her mind, that she needed to talk about what she’d been through, really open up to someone. Korra had wanted to talk to her mother, she just didn’t know how. There had been one evening down in the south, when they had spent the evening sharing a bottle of wine and watching the colours of the Aurora Astralis dance across the sky. It was a quiet, peaceful moment and she’d let her mind slip thinking, _I must bring Asami here to see this, she would love it._ And then she remembered that she might never have a future with Asami and she broke. She’d never let her parents see her cry before but her mother held her and softly sung to her an old water tribe lullaby and in that one moment she felt safe and loved and she wanted to tell her mother everything that had happened to her, why she always felt broken inside, but all she could do was cry. After that night, Korra tried to talk to her mother but she just couldn’t find the right words and fell back into the old habit of holding it all inside.

It was a couple of days later that inspiration struck. For her first month at home with her parents the communications with Asami had dwindled off. At first they’d skyped every day, then once a week, then the occasional message, then nothing. Korra hadn’t wanted to loose contact with Asami, she wanted the other woman to know that she was there for her whenever she needed, so she started to write her letters. Korra was a believer that email was for geeks and paedophiles and she wanted to send Asami something tangible. So once a week she would send Asami a letter by post, telling her about her week. She hadn’t received any correspondence in return but she figured that if Asami didn’t appreciate the letters she would have texted her and requested that she stop. This whole letter-writing concept gave her the idea to write her haunting past down.

Originally she planned to sent the accounts as letters but the idea of sending such personal information into a void was unsettling, besides Asami had enough to worry about without her adding to it. That was why Korra now had an empty journal mocking her. She was going to write it all down in one place and give it to her when they were reunited ( _If we are ever reunited)._ She just needed to push her fears aside and start the writing process. But for now, settling into her room for the next four years was enough stress to deal with without getting emotional about her past.

* * *

 

A few hours and a trip to the gym later Korra was back in her room, with Naga, her very large polar bear-dog curled up on the bed next to her. This was all new to her and she wasn’t sure she’d made the right choice her future and she was feeling altogether a little overwhelmed by the whole situation. She held Naga close and started to hum and quietly murmur the lullaby that her mother had sung to her only weeks ago.

 

_A gentle breeze from Hushabye Mountain_

_Softly blows o'er lullaby bay._

_It fills the sails of boats that are waiting--_

_Waiting to sail your worries away._

_It isn't far to Hushabye Mountain_

_And your boat waits down by the quay._

_The winds of night so softly are sighing--_

_Soon they will fly your troubles to sea._

_So close your eyes on Hushabye Mountain._

_Wave good-bye to cares of the day._

_And watch your boat from Hushabye Mountain_

_Sail far away from lullaby bay._

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've loved the idea of steeling 'Hushabye Mountain' from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang for use as a Water Tribe Lullaby, I think the imagery fits perfectly with the cold icy south.
> 
> Also I've snuck a quote in there from one of my favourite movies, can anyone spot it?
> 
> As always,
> 
> Comments?  
> Thoughts?  
> Typos?  
> Let me know below


	3. Missing connections

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Asami visits the grave of her grandparents and meets an unexpected family tie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's not letter at the end of this chapter. I debated about adding it or not but the chapter is long enough without it and I didn't think it fair to Asami to add that letter in with this, even though the theme of the two would work well together. 
> 
> This chapter is largely an exercise in filling in backstory and there's a lot of it.

The harsh desert sun was causing all sorts of distortions on the horizon. More than once Asami had thought that she could see the city of Zaofu in the distance, only to be disappointed and then cursing herself for being so stupid considering the GPS indicated that she was still hours off. Not only that but she also thought that she’d seen something jumping out of the sand like a whale breaching itself in the ocean, so she was starting to doubt her own sanity. Asami was regretting making the choice to ride across the desert road and vowed that on the return trip she would book herself a cabin on a sleeper train and put her bike on as cargo.

With each kilometre she rode Asami became painstakingly aware that she was the closest she’d been to Korra in months. Zaofu was the southern most capital city of the Earth Kingdom states and Korra was down in the Southern Water Tribe with her parents, but she wasn’t thinking about that. This trip wasn’t about Korra, it was about finding her family. Asami had always known that her maternal grand parents had passed before she was born but that was all she knew. Growing up she’d been curious about them but never wanted to broach the topic with Hiroshi. It had been Mai to fill in the gaps in Asami’s knowledge about her own family.

They had originally been from Zaofu and unsuccessful in starting a family. So they’d accepted their fate and got on with their lives and grown old in each other’s company. Yasuko had been a surprise blessing from the spirits for the couple in their later years. Unfortunately her grandfather’s health wasn’t the best anymore and the cool temperatures of the south weren’t good for him and when Yasuko was ten the family moved away from their friends and to a warmer climate.

Ten glorious years they spent together as a family in the Fire Nation, the pair saw their little girl grow into a strong and talented young woman but they missed their friends. With their daughter busy at college they decided to take a trip back to visit their friends. Her grandfather developed a cold while there, which turned into pneumonia, which turned into bronchitis and ended up in Zaofu General. Her grandmother spent all of her time looking after her husband but she was stubborn and old and refused to let anyone know that she was sick as well. She passed away first, holding her husbands hand and she slept by his side. He passed away a day later having lost his will to live with his beloved now gone. Yasuko arranged for her parents to be buried in their family plot in Zaofu, which was where Asami was now headed. She wanted to pay respect to the grandparents she never had a chance to meet, the people who raised her mother to be caring and sweet and smart.

\---

The long straight road through the arid desert transitioned into a winding road through lush green mountains ranges and cool forest coverings. The light from the afternoon sun was cresting at the top of the mountains and illuminating the clouds above her in warm shades of purple and orange. As beautiful as the natural phenomena was Asami didn’t have the time to stop and admire it, the city of Zaofu was protected at night by a metal dome formed from petal shaped panels, that raised and lowered to give the effect of a blooming lotus flower and if Asami didn’t make it inside the city before night fall she would be stuck on the outside for the evening. Maybe if she was stuck outside Ba Sing Se for the evening she wouldn’t mind so much but being this far south meant that it was going to get cold.

She opened up the throttle and wished, to whatever spirits might be listening, that there weren’t any speed traps along the way. As she rounded the final bend, Zaofu was open up in front of her, with the final rays of sunlight reflecting off of solar panels that lined the giant petals. The entire city glimmered and no matter how many times Asami had seen it, it would always take her breath away. Unlike Republic City, that had grown and expanded over time resulting in a culmination of architecture styles that spanned centuries, Zaofu had been designed as a whole complete with decades worth of expansion plans that would contribute to the unified aesthetic. To Asami, Zaofu was a feat of modern architecture, and she would always be in awe of it.

As she pulled up to the guard post she fished her passport out of the inside pocket of her leathers and handed it over to the inspectors. Even though the city was part of the Earth Kingdom Territories, the city officials made sure that they knew exactly who was within the city limits at all times. Asami removed her helmet as the guard made the necessary identity check then sent her on her way. Asami was exhausted from her long day of riding and as she skirted the perimeter of the city looking for a cheep motel to stay in all she could think about was a cleansing shower and a cosy bed. Usually when Asmi stayed in Zaofu for work, the company put her up in one of the villas reserved for visiting diplomats, so she was having to scope out what accommodation was available to her which was more taxing on her already tired body then she would like.

The petals of the domes slowly made their assent above her and the city lights flicked on just as she came across a B&B that looked like it would suit her for her stay. She quickly checked in, paying cash in advance for her stay before heading to her room and passing out on the bed before even getting a chance to shower.

\---

Zaofu’s lawn cemetery was outside the city walls and nested at the base of the mountains to the south. There was a Zen Garden in the centre filled with large water polished stones and boulders (to which someone was currently tending with a rake) and radiating out from the garden were metal nameplates flush with the ground. The pattern the nameplates formed was a Fibonacci pattern and it made her inner maths nerd very happy. At the entrance was an automated information kiosk that showed on a map of the grounds where loved ones were buried. Asami made her way down one of the spiral paths that led to where her grandparents were. Her insides twisted with anxious butterflies, she still wasn’t sure what she was hoping to achieve by visiting them, she just felt like it was the right thing to do.

Like the rest of the grave sites, at first glance her grandparent’s was just an unassuming metal name plate with an engraving that read

_Ichirou & Masami_

_Husband & Wife_

_Father & Mother_

Asami’s breath caught in her throat, upon reading the inscription and she knelt down on the ground to steady herself. She’d never known that she’d been named after her grandmother and she felt a pang of sadness, as she fully comprehended that this was another part of her family puzzle, but that the pieces were never meant to fit. Her family history was a story of endings never reaching new beginnings, told by the ghosts of missing parents. She wasn’t sure when the tears had started to fall, but she sniffed as she wiped her eyes dry.

When she looked back at the nameplate she thought she saw a shadow over the corner, at first she thought that her vision was blurry from the crying, but there in the corner was small etching and she recognised it as her mother’s handiwork immediately. She’d spent days as a child playing with the metal plates that were covered with her mother’s acid etchings, laying them out in rows trying to make the pictures tell stories and she’d always marvelled that while Hiroshi could build beautiful things from metal, her mother could make the metal itself look beautiful. This etching was no different but it touched her more than those she’d played with as a child. Her eyes traced the gentle curves of the wave to where it crested on the cusp of breaking, the rays of light from the rising sun on the horizon to where the light danced in the ripples of the wave. There was sadness in the etching, a longing but there was no mistaking the meaning, it was her, Asami, the morning sea.

Asami reached out a hand to run over the contours of the relief but before her hand could make contact a voice from behind startled her.

‘It’s beautiful isn’t it?’ She whipped around and looked up at the woman standing over her, initially she couldn’t make out her face as the sun was shining from behind the woman but as she stood to properly address the woman she recognised her immediately as Suyin Beifong, matriarch and leader of Zaofu. ‘I’m sorry I didn’t mean to startle you Miss Sato.’

‘N-n-not at all.’ She felt herself blush at her awkward stammering, _pull yourself together woman._ And then she felt her professional side kick in ‘Sorry Mrs Beifong. To what do I owe this pleasure?’ Sami had had business dealing with both Suyin’s husband and eldest son but never had the woman herself.

‘Please, not need for formality, call me Su.’ She smiled at Asami and offered her hand, which Asami took in her own in greeting.

‘Asami.’

‘Well, Asami, as I was saying, the etching is beautiful isn’t it.’

Asami looked down to the etching and felt a smile tug at the corner of her mouth. ‘Yes, it is.’

‘I remember the day your mother added it to the site. You were quite a bit smaller back then. Come, I’ll tell you about it.’

Asami’s mind had shut down for a moment, _mum knew Suyin Beifong, leader of the Metal Clan and Matriarch of Zaofu, how did I not know this?_ She quickly realised that she hadn’t offed a response and Su was looking at her expectantly, she quickly nodded and offered her thanks in response.

Suyin led her to the Zen garden and Asami realised that it must have been Su who had been tending it earlier. They both took a seat on boulders and Su started her story.

‘Your mother and I were good friends before her family moved to the Fire Nation. Our families were friends and while I was a few years older then her Yasuko never let that get in the way of joining in and having fun with us older kids.’ A smile made its way onto Su’s face and Asami realised that she wasn’t the only person who’d had her mother torn out of their lives, that there were people all over the world that had cared about the woman she’d only ever known as _mum._ ‘I was a terror of a child, always getting into trouble, your mother was small and unassuming so she made a fantastic look out for our shenanigans because no one ever expected her.’ A soft laugh escaped Su as she continued. ‘Your mother often tried to worn me about my wayward ways. She once drew a wanted poster with my likeness on it but she was a good friend,’ her voice suddenly turning serious, ‘she never turned us in.

‘After your mother left I didn’t see her again until the funeral. I’d never seen someone who’d once been so full of life, look so broken. There is no sadder sigh in the world that an adult who’s become an orphan. My mother took her in while she was in town for the funeral. I would have liked to spend the time with my old friend but I had Junior to look after.’ All these new perspectives on her mother were at odds with who she remembered as her mum, and her mind was working overtime trying to fit it all together. ‘It was another few years before I saw your mother again and if I had have known it was to be the last I might have insisted that she stay longer. My own mother had left to roam the world and I inherited the family legacy. It was a rough time, I had two children under seven with a third on the way and I was trying to figure out all this new responsibility.

‘But when your mother came to my door with a haunted look in her eyes and you asleep in her arms, I knew I had to help. She spent the whole week visiting her parents grave with her art supplies, she never let me know what she was up to but she just ask that I look after you while she was gone. She never mentioned that you could run so fast, you would have been about one and a half and all you wanted to do was play with the boys, Junior was seven and wouldn’t have anything to do with you, but Huan was about three and helped me take care of you, he was most curious about you as he was soon to have his own baby sister.

‘At the end of the week your mother invited me down here to show me what she’d been up to. She explained that she wanted to properly introduce you to her parents and lamented that you’d never get to know each other and how she wished that she had her mum there to help her with motherhood. She left that afternoon and gifted Huan with a box of paints for helping look after you. That one act influenced his life more that anything else has, he never put those paints down and it’s still his medium of choice, you should come have a look at his stuff.’

This was all a little too much for Asami to handle at once. She hadn’t been expecting this today. She just wanted to pay her respects; she wasn’t ready to here more about her mother. Her thoughts raced through her head and she couldn’t grasp them properly. Her chest felt like someone had put a clap around her and was squeezing, her throat stung with tears about to escape, it had been years since her last panic attack and she wasn’t ready for it, not now. With her mind devoid of any propriety and pushed herself off the boulder and ran. She didn’t care that she was being rude, she didn’t care that she was chasing after her, she didn’t care that she left her bike in the care park of cemetery, she just ran. Her lungs burned as she struggled to breath, but she kept running, the tears were streaming across her face but she didn’t stop to wipe them away, she just ran and ran and didn’t stop until she was safe behind the door of her room in the B&B, where she collapsed in sobbing ball, wishing that the world would just stop and swallow her up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't hate me for this chapter. It wasn't an easy one for me to write.
> 
> As always,
> 
> Comments?  
> Thoughts?  
> Typos?  
> Let me know below


	4. Fun, Fur and Facing the Past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Korra's got a little too much free time on her hands and turns around to face her past.
> 
> Also new end paragraph in Korra's letter since yesterday (June 4th) (it didn't post the first time)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An update???? YES!!!
> 
> Sorry to keep you all waiting. life and stuff, I don't really want to go too much into it.  
> You might need to go back and recap some old stuff to get your head around this chapter (I know I did).
> 
> You'll notice that I'm leaving out a lot of information in Korra's story line, I'll be doing the same with Asami's. This part of the series is going to focus more on the letters that they are reading/writing and less on what they are actually up to (but we will still see just enough of that to keep the story moving forward. 
> 
> There will be a part three to this story, so please bare with me in this second part, regardless of where our heroines are now Korrasami is endgame, so please don't loose hope.

Mid-semester break was upon her, and while the other students were out partying and postponing the mountain of work that was due in the coming weeks, Korra was meditating in the temple. The soft smell of the sandalwood swirled around the circular meditation pavilion and Korra felt the harmony settle into her very being. Having knuckled down and gotten on top of her work load during the term, and not let herself get caught up in the revelry of the younger students, Korra now had all of the break to spend relaxing, which was proving to be a little more difficult than originally anticipated.

Korra wasn’t good with free time, she usually kept herself busy with work because the more time she spent focussed and being productive meant there was less time she had to dwell and reflect on her personal problems.

Korra had the temple to herself, the mid-semester break coincided with the autumn equinox, a sacred time for the Air Nation, during which the monks sequestered themselves down in a grotto near the island’s shore, a time spent fasting and reflecting on the balance of the universe. The first day of the break she’d spent working out and spending some much needed quality time with Naga; racing the polar-bear dog around the island (Naga swam, she ran), was a good way to burn off her built up frustration from being cooped up inside studying. The next day she spent confined in her room, relishing in the fact that she didn’t have to be quiet while she masturbated furiously because while the monks weren’t celibate (in fact the classified sexual gratification as a spiritual experience), Korra just never felt comfortable knowing that people might hear her. But by the third day, the dark thoughts that she’d kept at bay with her enviable and rigours study habits were front and centre, and with Gyatso down with the other monks she had to deal with them by herself, hence the meditation.

With each exhale she tried to let go of each worrying thought. _Breathe in, 1, 2, 3, exhale. Breathe in calm and serenity, 1, 2, 3, exhale worry and fear. Peace, 1, 2, 3, doubt. Uni is going well, 1, 2, 3, don’t think about Asami. You’re sleeping though the nights, 1, 2, 3, don’t think about Asami. Don’t think about Asami, 1, 2, 3, Don’t think about Asami. Don’t think about Asami. Don’t think about Asami. DON’T THINK ABOUT ASAMI._

Korra grunted with frustration as she tried to shake the thoughts of her ex-girlfriend away. She hadn’t heard from her in months, why should she care anymore? After the first month of silence she’d checked Asami’s social media profiles just to make sure the woman was all right but even they had been void of Asami’s presence. It was a little reassuring in a way, at least she wasn’t being singled out; Asami seemed to have cut everyone off. Korra had even Googled the other woman in hopes that the paparazzi might have posted pictures of her comings and goings but nothing had been posted about Asami since before they’d even started dating.

Having lost all ability to focus on her meditation exercises, Korra trudged back to her room. When she opened the door Naga looked up at her from her place on the floor and Korra was immediately pleased that she had her friend here with her. In recent years they hadn’t spent much time together, Republic city was just too hot for the polar bear-dog to live there without living in a permanently temperature controlled environment, and while Korra’s pension was sizeable, she couldn’t afford that type of energy bill. But Naga was here with her now and it filled her with a tremendous amount of comfort. She could always count on Naga to keep her secrets and keep her company and keep her bad dreams at bay.

Korra knew that there were other soldiers with PTSD who had been assigned service dogs to help with their rehab, but Naga wasn’t a service dog, she was different. For starters they’d been together since she was six years old and while she couldn’t take her to military school, Korra had insisted that her parents show Naga the photos of her that she’d taken and she’d even recorded personal letters onto cassettes to be played to her so she wouldn’t forget who she was. It all seemed a bit silly to her now as an adult but back then it had been important to her that she do whatever was necessary to remain close to her animal friend. The other thing that set Naga apart from service dogs was that she was larger than most small cars and faster too.

Making her way into the room Korra gave Naga a scratch behind the ears before she flopped down onto her bed and reached for the PS3 controller and turned the system on. While she waited for everything to boot up she checked her phone, it was the Monday public holiday of the equinox long weekend and while the United Republic didn’t follow the holiday, the Water Tribes did though, which meant her Dad would be at home driving her mother mad. She smiled at the thought and sent him off a text

 **Korra (14:34): -** Zombie hunting time, or can I finally drag your chicken shit ass into the Nether?

She didn’t need to wait for a replay, no sooner had she pressed send did the notification on her TV then she show that her dad was online. While she was at home after leaving the city she’d introduced her father to Minecraft. It didn’t matter that it was a looked down upon as a children’s game, for her what was important was that it had no gore, no guns and the creepers were more of a nuisance than a jump scare when they blew shit up and it kept her distracted.

Two hours and enough XP points spent to enchant her diamond armour later and Korra was once again left alone with her thoughts. The bonding time with her dad had been cut short when he informed her that he was supposed to be supposed to be preparing for a big meeting the following day and that he had to go. It was probably for the best though; Korra’s eyes were starting to see blocks everywhere and Naga was starting to whine about something and judging from the time it was probably important that she let the beast outside or she would have a mess to clean up.

While Naga was out, Korra fussed about organising her desk. She had piles of handwritten notes that she didn’t need anymore, class handouts that she should probably file for future reference and that same empty journal, sitting on the shelf above the desk reminding her that she still hadn’t even attempted to write down her story.

It almost didn’t seem worth it now, since Asami was a veritable ghost these days and she didn’t know if she’d ever get the chance to hand it over to her or if she’d even care. She knew that she’d cared for Asami deeply but the time apart meant that Korra was second guessing whether or not they had shared a deep connection or if they were just two lonely and horny women satiating needs. Korra pushed those thoughts aside as she reached for the book, Tenzin was right, she did need to talk about what she’d been through and just because she could vocalise to someone else didn’t mean that just writing it down for herself would have a similar cathartic effect.

* * *

 

 

> Dear Asami,
> 
> I’ve written many letters to you but this might be the hardest and I’m not even sure if you’ll get to read it. Some of the things I’m about to tell you are confidential but for my own recovery it is best if I’m completely honest. What you are about to read over the coming pages are my accounts of how I became the ‘War Hero’ the world sees me as, what really happened and what it cost me to come out the other side.
> 
> I’m not sure what we are to each other but I trust you to keep what I’m about to disclose to yourself. And I still feel like I owe you an explanation for all those times I had ‘an episode’. Please understand that this is not my way of trying to guilt you into feeling like you need to help me. This is me writing about the most traumatic experiences of my life to the person ….

* * *

 Korra ripped the page out of the book and threw it in the trash. These stories needed a prelude, some sort of explanation but none of what she had written sounded right. She decided that if she ever handed this journal over to Asami she could include a letter inside as way of explanation but for now she would just write.

* * *

 

 

> The story starts back when I was 21, even though I’d been enlisted to the Marines when I was 16, they wouldn’t let me go on any missions until I was ‘Officially’ of age. As a result, I’d spent 5 years training my butt off and getting cockier every day, by the time I reached 21 I was convinced that I was the best soldier that ever was. Oh how I was wrong.
> 
> So at the time there was the hacker Amon making a big name for himself by exposing the pay discrepancies between corporate fat deer-cats and their hardworking employees, as well as exposing underhanded dealings and what not. I’m sure you remember, he’s online logo was a kabuki mask. Any way, the story that the media got a hold of was that he was planning to blow up some banks and that I tracked him down, but when I went to arrest him he chose to blow himself up rather then be brought to justice. Which is a very glorified version of events and glosses over some major details.
> 
> A lot of the public loved Amon, they saw him as the kind of guys that was looking out for the little guys, but he’d been on a number of watch lists for a while as a person of interest. A lot of information was being traded on the black market, and intelligence agencies knew that Amon was behind it. He had been publishing the financial information to tarnish these companies’ public images but he was also trading with stolen information and they needed to find out to what end. That’s where I came in.
> 
> Over time Amon had amassed a fan base of hackers that were causing all sorts of online anarchy, in fact most of the online exposures in the later months weren’t done by him at all but this group of hackers following in his footsteps. These hackers had hideouts all over the globe and it was suspected that Amon was hiding among them. The team I was apart of was tasked with infiltrating these hide outs, locating Amon and then calling for backup to help bring him down. I only got the first half of it right.
> 
> Like I said I was cocky and this caused me to fuck it all up. My partner Tarrlok and I infiltrated a cell of hackers in Republic City down near the docks. When we got to the warehouse we didn’t initially realise that anything was wrong, the whole place looked make shift, like they were ready to bolt at a moment's notice, but nothing looked out of place, there was a bunch of laptops all with wireless internet dongles attached, a fridge and microwave in the corner, an army munitions crate, a D&D game going on in the corner. And that’s when we realised our intel was wrong. At this stage we didn’t know of his plans to blow up the banks but the army munitions crate was a glaring warning sign that something far more nefarious was going on then just intel trading.
> 
> When we saw the crate we should have gotten out of there reported back to command that something bigger was going on, in fact that’s exactly what Tarrlok wanted to do but I was convinced that since we’d made it that far we might as well see what else we could find. So I sat down at one of the unmanned laptops and started digging around, the guy next to me was playing pinball on his laptop so I didn’t think it looked too conspicuous that I wasn’t ‘hacking.’ I slipped a USB stick into the machine and copied a whole heap of .txt files that meant nothing to be but looked like they might to someone who know what they were looking for. Meanwhile my partner kept hissing in my ear that we should go and that this wasn’t the sort of place we wanted to get stuck but I was too fixated on what I was going to really pay attention to him but that wasn’t the only thing I wasn’t paying attention to. What I failed to notice, was that me sitting at that particular laptop had drawn peoples attention and in my haste to prove myself I forgot that we still didn’t know what Amon looked like, for example, that he could have been the DM of the D&D game in the corner. So by the time I’d slipped the stick back into my pocket, my partner and I had a group of angry hackers to fight our way through.
> 
> We were lucky they weren’t armed with guns, one or two of them had knives, but it was clear that none of them had any real combat training, nor were any of them expecting to fight. It didn’t take long for us to subdue the group but that proved enough time for Amon to fiddle with something unseen in the corner. So when my partner turned his attention to him, Amon let him get in real close before overpowering him and putting him in an arm lock, it was then that Amon exposed the C4 he had strapped to his chest and took Tarrlok hostage. I was frozen in shock as Amon dragged him out of the room, by the time I shock myself out of it, Amon was already on his boat with Tarrlok and out in the bay. As I ran to the edge of the docks I radioed for backup and just when I was about to commandeer a vessel to take chase, the explosions occurred, one out in the bay and the other in the warehouse.
> 
> All I could think was, I deserved it. I did wrong. I didn’t follow orders.
> 
> The next few months after that are a bit of a blur. My face was all over the papers and because the authorities didn’t want the public to know just how much of a cock up one of their supposed ‘best of the best’ had made, I was painted as the saviour of the city. Despite this I was almost court marshalled for failure to follow orders and misconduct resulting in loss of lives. It turns out the only thing that saved my arse was that USB stick.
> 
> Nothing was salvageable from the explosion and the other hid outs were just lackeys, so all the intel we had was on that stick. Apparently Amon was a hacker for higher and the files I’d copied showed that there was someone far more powerful pulling the strings. The files also detailed plans to blow up multiple banks around the world. It turned out that Amon was actually some guy called Noatak, heir to some large crime family, and not the common man for the common people he depicted himself as. While I was suspended, the rest of my team used their still intact covers to circulate his true identity to the few remaining hacker cells in operation. They soon gave up their will to continue Amon’s campaign, realising that it was all based on lies. A few loyalists were detained but most were naïve kids that had no idea of his true plans.
> 
> Even to this day the whole things doesn’t sit well with me, there were too many loose ends and things that don’t make sense. It was never discovered who Amon was working for, all the leads they had went cold. And it also doesn’t make sense that he would blow himself up, he could have just ran, melted back into obscurity, on top of that, not only that but if he had been apprehended, the worst that would have happened to him was that he would sit in a prison cell for the rest of his life, why choose death?
> 
> After this I was taken off of active duty. I had to attend mandatory counselling because of my partner’s death that I was whiteness to. I’d never been close to the guy so I didn’t take it too badly, I was madder at myself for being responsible for his death. The whole ordeal was a bit of a wake up call, that I wasn’t as good as I thought I was and that I still had a lot to learn. Apparently I hadn’t been woken up enough, because when the Water Tribe civil war started a few months later, I went AWOL and took up arms to fight for my people.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So.... was it worth the wait?
> 
> Anything missing that you want to know? (I might tell you, I also might not)
> 
> Let me know what you think in the comments or hit me up over on Tumblr.

**Author's Note:**

> Come find me on [Tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/courtneyfg) and keep me motivated. 
> 
> Also I'm open to prompts (they help with the writer's block) so hit up my ask box or leave note in the comments section.


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